Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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