Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
