In the future we'll all be gay
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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