i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize