You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
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