whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
