Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
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He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
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I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
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