so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
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I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
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I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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