called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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