I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
