ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Randomize
