I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
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