When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
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