Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
