I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
