i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
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I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
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You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?