Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Randomize