I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
