so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
