There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Randomize
