just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
