Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
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