Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
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