so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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