what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
