I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
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