I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
