Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Randomize