i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
