walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
there is glitter all over my balls
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