my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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