I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
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She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
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Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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