so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
