it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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