so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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