I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize
