she was so not down for the gang bang
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
i can't believe i had my finger in that
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
