I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
NoShamevember. You game?
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
