I am puke
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Please don't give away my fajitas
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
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