I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
