i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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