Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
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