sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
