From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I just want to make out with him forever
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
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