You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
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