U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
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