This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize