addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Randomize
