I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
