do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
